Colonial-era Sydney and I am condemned to death for sodomy
I am taken to a cell, stripped and given prisoner’s clothes
during my execution I am chained and thrown into a shallow lake where I drown
***
in an auditorium for celebrities
singing songs
I am psychotic in my dreams
apocalypse
5963
***
I drive to the local shopping centre to buy cigarettes
I am shocked that the cheapest packet now costs $42
***
Dream that Athens is burning
Athens the dream city
***
I am on an international train journey from Sydney to Singapore to Berlin
***
home break in
black police cop
house:
giving birth to satanic ram
locks doors
director’s assistant
***
The smoke in my throat
The smoke in my lungs
The cancer in my eyes
***
good luck good luck I can walk all I want all I want
I can walk I can walk
in heaven
exactly like us exactly like everyone else everyone else everyone else
good luck good luck I can walk all I want all I want
I can walk I can walk
in heaven
exactly like us exactly like everyone else everyone else everyone else
god’s property property
***
Hubert Selby Jr is living in my house, old and ill
He dies and leaves me his poems
I contact his estate so I can publish them
***
I am packed into a room,
a girl starts bleeding from the mouth
and dripping in blood —
they tell me to escort her to the bathroom
***
video game violence
a friend poisons my coffee
working in libraries and being late for shifts
alien apocalypse in baroque interiors
escaping countries with newly appointed dictators
a sense of regret
***
a gay pornographic novel written at age 13
***
dream that this elite corporation
I am gay in Weimar Germany
shift to suburban scene
***
and the double —
staring into the face of my own suicide
face to face with my own death
***
I flip through my copy of William S. Burroughs’ “The Western Lands”
the pages are falling out
I tell myself that I must order a new copy
***
disembodied from the head up
the thought of bodies never had, nor ever will
***
Death letter —
I wept for hours upon hearing it
***
I feel as adjacent as a mirror
***
dream where I am initiated into a gay vampire cult
the lead vampire sucks the blood from my neck; I die and become one of them
***
attending a lecture on traditions of pederasty in Modern Greek folk song —
at a massive warehouse
***
there are no great poems as much
as there are great dishwashers
and soap dispensers
***
I relish life at the same moment that I am disgusted by it
***
spew spleen
green like the jacket on the train
bloated in the belly and disgust but beauty
the thumb raw but the beautiful man
***
In Mexico City and I come across books on gay S&M sex magic
the proprietor tells me that the sex magic is:
“instead of a cock in your mouth a pair of scissors folded together”
the two volumes are $300 each
***
the image alone makes me sick
an entire city conspiring to make me ill
a body collapsed
hyenas’ brew
picked skin
they do not know what they say
when the elf cuts you in quarters
limbs, faces and raw nerves
splaying and curdling with blood and shame
crash test
armour not pallid
the agony of waiting
***
the human body is the most disgusting sight in the world
there are things like death, murder and war that should be permitted
***
I sit on my balcony
staring at endless rows of houses which appear faceless
***
spirit’s name is Sarah
baby died when it was 12 months old
when I asked why she is still down there she said: “I’m straddled”
***
the old man eats hartwort and chervil and gets a boner
***
what I meant to say was that you are incorrigible
***
the world of material forms is dead.
Misha the Maniac
Athens, Greece
24 October 2023
All images supplied by Misha the Maniac
